A family is at the dinner table when the son asks his father,

“How many types of boobs are there?” Surprised, the father answers,

“Well, son, there are three kinds of boobs… In her 20’s, a woman’s boobs are like melons; round and firm.

“In her 30’s, 40’s and 50’s they’re like pears; still nice but hanging a bit. “After 60, they’re like onions” “Onions?” the boy asks. “Yes, you see them and they make you cry.” 

This infuriated the wife and daughter, so the daughter turns to her mother and asks, “Mom, how many types of ‘willies’ are there?

The mother smiles and answers, “Well, Dear… A man goes through three stages.

“In his 20’s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. “In his 30’s, 40’s and 50’s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. 

“After his 60’s, it’s like a tree. A tree? she asks. “Yes. The tree is dead, and the balls are just for decoration.”