A man sat on a towel on a beach. He had no arms or legs.
3 Women walked past & felt sorry for him. 1 said “U ever had a hug?” He said “No” so she hugged him & walked on.
2nd said, “U ever had a kiss?”
He said “No” so she kissed him & walked on.
3rd said, “U have ever been fu**ed?” He said “No” as his eyes lit up…
… she said, “U will be when the tide comes in.”
A woman in her 70s decided it was finally time to get married. She put an add out in the newspaper. “Husband wanted. Must not beat me,…
“Please, Your Honor, I’d like to be excused from jury duty,” pleaded an anxious-looking man. “Why should I excuse you?” asked the judge. “You see, I owe…
A large, well established, Canadian lumber camp advertised that they were looking for a good lumberjack. The very next day, a skinny little man showed up at…
A man at work calls home and his 8-year-old daughter picks up the phone: “Hi honey, this is daddy. Is Mommy near the phone? “No Daddy she…
Ask anybody who has a cat in their life and they will tell you that it is one of the best decisions they ever made. That being…
A wife is running in the park And takes a break to stretch near two men. As she’s stretching, a beautiful woman passes all three of them,…