An undressed woman is bouncing on her bed singing.
Her husband walks into the bedroom and sees her.
He watches her a while then says, “You look ridiculous! What on earth do you think you’re doing?”
She says, “I just got my checkup and my doctor says I have the melons of an eighteen year old.”
She starts laughing and jumping again.
He says, “Yeah, right. And what did he say about your 45-year-old bum?”
“Your name never came up,” she replied.
Upon landing hard, the pilot got on the PA system, “Sorry, folks, for the hard landing. It wasn’t my fault, blame it on the asphalt.” On this…
Darryl and Harold were the best patients in a mental institution. The place had an unusual annual contest, picking two of the best patients and giving them…
Two cowboys came upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, “You…
Three drunk guys are sitting behind a couple of nuns at a football game (whose habits partially blocked the view). In an effort to get the nuns…
When Pat and Mike met each other on the street one day, Pat noticed that Mike had a terrible cold. “Have you seen a doctor about that…
Three priests were having lunch in a restaurant. One said, “You know, all summer I have been having trouble with bats in the belfry. I’ve tried everything…